There’s a new series on TV called, Younger, starring Sutton Foster, that is so fun.  The concept is of a newly divorced mother trying to re-enter the work force at 40, and being turned down due to her age by interviewers in their 20’s.  While ridiculous on its face, there are truths, or at least issues, I can relate to.

Not a fan of aging, or of people complaining about being old, or how old they are, and blah, blah, blah, I so relate to this character.

The ideas of youthful freedom are as tantamount as the inexperience and relative irresponsibility of being young.  So while I complain about those who complain about being old, I see the bounty of perspective.  I see how each and every day led to me to where I am, and I wouldn’t care to repeat much of that time.

I learned about betrayal, heartache, false friends, misguided trust, and self-reliance.  Being my own best friend was hard-gained, and learning that being alone was alright took several years.

It was miserable when I saw younger people see me as older.  It was truly fucking awful, but what could I do?  I couldn’t afford surgery to try to stay perpetually 20, and even if I could, why would I want to?  I was there!  So, my twenties sucked – a lot of it.  I also had a lot of fun.  My thirties came quicker than I expected, but there ya go – it happened, and so did my forties…

Acceptance is a bitch sometimes.  If I could disguise myself and be seen as young, and get a do-over, what a different time it would be.  It’s universal: the desire to be young and yet have a wise perspective.  Twenty-somethings might never feel that way, but wait until they hit forty.  The difference is like looking out, or down, from a high cliff rather than ground level.  Whether you know what to do with that vantage point is dependent on many factors, but the lucky few who understand their worth and their abilities get to make a pretty good life for themselves and their loved ones.

It’s not a magic formula, I know.  There are those who are confident and capable and life is a douche-bag to them anyway, but usually, perseverance can lead them through the rough patches.

And there will be rough patches.  I don’t care how gilded a life is, it isn’t exempt from some form of hell.  Perhaps I’d gladly exchange my hell for theirs, but hell it is.

So, unless I can radically change my life, it would be wiser for me to accept where I am.

I guess I can accept it, but I don’t approve of it.




© seekingsearchingmeaning (aka Hermionejh) and Abstractly Distracted’s Blog, 2010 – current

Bread and Circuses

It’s astounding to me that people are more in tune with who’s in the lead on “Dancing With The Stars”, or “American Idol” than they understand what is happening in their country and world.  I’m grateful for news and commentary shows, such as The Rachel Maddow Show, Countdown with Keith Olbermann, Meet The Press, etc., that at least touches on what’s happening politically (national and global), and what the ramifications for our society might be, or are.

I think we are in the midst of world upheaval, politically, societally, and physically.  Maybe our society has always been in the midst of change, but this feels more intense than any other change I’ve witnessed, or read about, in my life.  Maybe the decline of Rome was more severe than what we are currently experiencing, I don’t know.

It seems that our societal factions are like colliding tectonic plates, both sides creating chaos, and deforming the political and social landscape until enough energy is expended to become stable again.

I know our American democratic republic is an experiment, and perhaps I’ll see its demise in my lifetime.  I know we’ve already had many of the rights enumerated in our constitution weakened or dismantled, like the fourth amendment, and even habeas corpus, by allowing warrant-less wiretaps, portions of the PATRIOT Act allowing invasions of personal privacy, holding prisoners without cause, and violating the Geneva conventions, in places like Abu Ghraib prison, Guantanamo Bay, and other illegal rendition sites.

Our government attacked a sovereign nation (Iraq) that did not harbor Al-Qaeda, or the Taliban, and was complying with sanctions on weapons of mass destruction (WMD’s), etc.  Saddam Hussein may have been a horrible leader, but it was the United States that helped him with the weaponry and finances he needed to commit atrocities against the Kurds, Shi’ites, and others.  Perhaps one of the unspoken justifications for attacking Iraq was to rid the world of a horrific leader we helped create, but we also wanted control over oil reserves, and/or to keep, or position, ourselves militarily to gain, or maintain, control by having another permanent military base in that part of the world.

Meanwhile, there are companies like Monsanto and Syngenta placing officials in government and finance to gain control over the food supply by not only creating and distributing terminator seeds worldwide, but also edging out family farms, and seed distributors through ‘agri-mafia’ tactics and helping create regulations so stringent that only multi-billion dollar operations can survive.  Guess who the only multi-billion agriculture game in town is?

I know that there are arguments for genetically modified organisms (GMOs), and some of the research has been altruistic in trying to increase the food supply by modifying plant DNA to resist pests and increase yield.  The problem is, it messed with the pollen distributors: insects.  It also hasn’t improved many of the plants themselves.  Lab research and limited crop experiments prove no more than probability.  There are far too many variables in the wild for any GMO experiments to have field validity.  I heard a geneticist say that when there are no negative factors, that doesn’t mean that they tested for negatives, but that there were no tests done.  Those kind of statistics are arrived at all the time by excluding factors that could cause negative results, or less positive results, than desired.

The Earth will heal from whatever genius or stupid humans do to it.  Humans are the variable in this equation that will not come out so well in the end.  We have a choice, but unless this blog entry lasts eons, no one reading this will be around to witness the final outcome.  What we do now, however, can absolutely affect future outcomes.  The Earth, and humanity, has to have some champions, and I am moved by the disadvantaged, and will help them prevail, not those with the upper-hand, who often gain their position through equivocation and other devious methods.  I think we’ll be around a lot longer as a species if humanity develops more honor, empathy, and compassion.  After all, love is a verb, or it is a vain, pointless word.




© seekingsearchingmeaning (aka Hermionejh) and Life On Earth’s Blog, 2010 – infinity.